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SUP NERDS

I know I said I was going to post about something else but FORGET THAT I decided to write this instead.  It’s very spur of the moment and deeply emotional blah blah blah all that shit.

I feel like I may not always get across everything in my head.  This may of course be the curse of the introspective.   But although I always try, sometimes I feel as though there is a disconnect between what I manage to express in any given social setting and who I feel I myself am.  Social norms constrain in many ways.

But every once in a while I like to do something like this.

EVERYBODY.  All of you, the ones I see every day, the ones I’d like to see more often, the ones I hardly see at all.

I care about you all very much.  Family, teachers, fellow students, homies, bros.  You’re all awesome and I mean that every time I say it.  I would not be able to be this good of a person, this optimistic of a person, this relentlessly cheerful as a human being if I didn’t have an amazing support group.

I wish you all well.  I hope you’re all happy on this Monday, and if you’re not I wish I could help.  Most likely I can’t in any highly meaningful way, but I’ll always try, with smiles and cake and rainbows.

Smiley face.

ON AN UNRELATED NOTE, here’s a deep monologue.

________________________________________________

Sometimes in life things are neat.  They work out the way they’re supposed to.  The first date is magical.  You feel like a wholly different person when you arrive for freshman year.  There’s an immediate phase shift and you’re just ready, psyched and off to the races.

Mostly they aren’t.  You’ll spend hours rehearsing, running over the sentence in infinite variety, planning every word, waiting for the perfect conversational break…and then get impatient, dump the practice out the window and just ask the girl out.  You’ll get off the plane on the first day of freshman year…and feel slightly dehydrated but not really that much different from when you got on.

Most things are like this.

Sometimes things have an end and a beginning.  You can point to them and say “Now, this ended right here.”

This really only applies to classes and internships.  Most things just go on and on and on and you pretty much deal with it, and suddenly one day you realize it’s not the first thing on your mind, and that at some point in the last month or so you’ve grown as a human being without even noticing it.

So there’s no point in waiting for an end, really.  No point in waiting for the ‘perfect moment.’  There already is a perfect moment, and it’s right here.  Right now.  You just have to make it fit your needs.

_____________________________________

Life is hard.

Some days life is really hard.

Some days life just SUCKS ASS. 

And you want to just let it all slide, and resign from life for a few days.  Throw all your friendships into the corner, shelve the manners and the work, and just abstain from the human race for a while.  Be lazy and petulant and everything that you can’t be past the age of fifteen.

But you know, there’s never not a reason to slide.

There’s never not SOMETHING. 

There’s always a reason to be childish.  To be lazy.  To slide.  And most of the time we don’t think it’s reason enough.

Now don’t look so glum.  This isn’t an indictment. We don’t do indictments.  SMILE.  You can always be happy.  No matter the day, just as there is always a cause for OHMYGODWHATTHEHELLWE’REALLGOINGTODIE, so there is also always a reason to smile.

You can always be polite.  The world can go to shit in a hackeysack and you can keep right on with the ‘yes sir’ ‘no sir.’  Even when it’s raining fire and zombies are crawling up from hell, you can still do your best to brighten up the room with a smile.

You can always be on time.  Though life is hard and really just downright sucks sometimes, in the words of Malcom Reynolds, you’re still flying, and you can always be the rock of reliability, be right there when you’re needed.

And you can always make an end.  You can do it right now, with no need to leave the computer, for twelve easy payments of $9.95 just by wishing it to be.  Say it aloud.  Make it a promise to yourself that you are moving on.

Even if it’s slow and awkward and halting and doesn’t feel real until weeks later.  Because if you fall once you can just get back up again.

Because there’s always a new moment.  They fall like rain, inexhaustible, each drop offering the promise of infinite renewal.

That’s why I like the rain.

That’s why this week is going to be wonderful, why it’s going to be the best week of our lives.

Because they all are, if you let them.  Life is wonderful if you let yourself live it.  If you enjoy the little things.

So smile.

It’s a beautiful day.

P.S.

69 posts.

Heh.

Heh heh.

69.

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2 Comments

  1. You are a fabulous human being. ❤


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