TOR’S FIRST LAW:
Resist your crustacean overlords!
TOR’S SECOND LAW:
There is nothing you cannot accomplish with a sufficiently large laser array.
- THE MAGNET COROLLARY: Anything you find too complex to accomplish with a large laser array can be done with magnets.
TOR’S THIRD LAW:
Being anything other than yourself is a waste of time.
TOR’S FOURTH LAW:
All people are awesome.
- THE IDIOT COROLLARY: Some people are silly, and forget that all people are awesome.
- THE SELF-DEPRECATION COROLLARY: Some people are silly, and forget that they are awesome.
- THE DEPRECATION COROLLARY: Popular perception of an object is NOT A PROPERTY OF THE OBJECT ITSELF. YOU ARE NOT WHAT PEOPLE THINK OF YOU, you are YOURSELF.
TOR’S SIXTH LAW:
Amethyst is shiny.
- THE SHINY COROLLARY: Ooooooooooooooo…..shiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiinnnnnnyyyyyyyyyyy………..
TOR’S SEVENTH LAW:
ANY DAY YOU ARE CURRENTLY ALIVE is WITHOUT DOUBT your BEST DAY EVER.
- SEVENTH LAW, SECTION 1: Because it is THE DAY IN WHICH YOU ARE LIVING.
- SEVENTH LAW, SECTION 2: Because IN EACH DAY THERE IS THE POTENTIAL FOR A COMPLETE METAMORPHOSIS, for an upheaval of thought and action that can CHANGE A LIFE. It may not be yours, and it may not be easy, but THE POTENTIAL IS ALWAYS THERE. CARPE THAT DIEM.
TOR’S EIGHTH LAW:
It does NO ONE ANY GOOD to worry about THINGS YOU CANNOT DO ANYTHING ABOUT AT THE MOMENT.
TOR’S NINTH LAW:
For every physical possibility, there is a universe. For every physical law, there is a universe in which the opposite is true. Thus, for every possibility, there is a corresponding universe. SOMEWHERE, BATMAN FIGHTS CRIME USING A GIANT LASER DRAGON.
TOR’S TENTH LAW:
This world we find ourselves in is infinitely complex. Good and evil lie closely intermingled. Do not fight one blindly, lest you find yourself destroying the other.